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The Madera Tribune

Oh, the Wonder of it all

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webmaster | 11/21/12

First, the Hostess Baking Co. is going to close; now it may not be closing. It makes you wonder what will happen to Wonder Bread. I remember Wonder Bread in my youth as the bread of preference. I remember Twinkies, Ho Ho’s and Ding Dongs as the desserts of preference.

Wonder Bread was a wonder for those of us brought up on lesser products, or on our moms’ homemade breads.

Homemade bread had hard crusts, was heavy and had to be sliced thick to keep it from falling apart. Wonder Bread, on the other hand, was nice and spongy, had a soft crust and would make us strong, as it was filled with iron.

It also came sliced — one of the first breads to be so packaged. We youngsters wondered how Wonder Bread could contain so much iron and still be light, springy and tasty. It was alleged to “build strong bodies 12 ways.” It also reportedly contained vitamins, so that meant we didn’t have to eat so many vegetables.

Then, as time went on, we learned that Wonder Bread maybe wasn’t all that wonderful. In spite of what our taste buds and tongues told us, nutritional experts told us Wonder Bread was mainly starch, and not all that good for us. This information came primarily from manufacturers of high-priced bread that tasted like ground up and reconstituted cardboard and cost twice the price of a loaf of Wonder Bread. Hmmm.

I still occasionally buy Wonder Bread and feast guiltily on it, usually when Mrs. Doud isn’t looking. I hope it doesn’t go away?

I do avoid Twinkies. In 1978, enraged politician Dan White killed San Francisco Mayor George Moscone and City Supervisor Harvey Milk, but avoided a murder conviction by claiming eating too many Twinkies caused him to have diminished capacity.

I don’t eat Twinkies because my capacity is diminished enough as it is.


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